Living Today

Today has been somewhat of a good day. I woke up this morning and I was feeling fine. I wasn't worried about anything and I am looking forward to moving. This will be the easiest move in my life. My therapist mentioned yesterday that it was a good thing that I was able to find another place to live considering what happened to me in my old apartment. She added that no one will have to know where I live unless I want them to. I must admit that was a comforting thought. She said that this could be a new beginning for me in ways unimaginable. To an extent, I really don't miss the apartment that I lost. There are a few items that I would love to salvage, but for the most part, that place was filled with so much pain. Even when the sun was shining, it seemed dark in there to me. I don't even miss the furniture I put time and money into purchasing. I feel like so much has been washed away physically, but now I have to work on cleansing things mentally and spiritually. I feel a little better since I told her what happened. She asked me what I was going to do to take care of myself this week. Maybe I will treat myself to something that will make me smile. What that is, I don't know yet. I spoke with my friend in Minnesota last night. He is doing fine and has found a place to rent. I am kind of glad that he is away. This way I won't feel like I am gravitating towards him for all the wrong reasons. The time apart will allow me to focus on me and improve me. Maybe someday I will make time for a relationship, but before I love outward, I have to love within. And that is something I have never been able to do. Maybe I can start trying to achieve that today. Till then.....